Updated: Sep 6, 2018
There are so many beliefs about yourself and about relationships that can create problems and negatively affect your love life. If you are having difficulty forming a lasting, nurturing relationship with another, or find it hard to make your relationships work, then your beliefs about love and intimacy may be in need of a redesign.
What you believe about romantic love and your own lovability is largely based on what you learned in childhood from your family and community. Unresolved feelings and painful experiences from childhood form subconscious patterns that affect your beliefs about romance and relationships.
If you look back, you can uncover the BS (belief system) that has been blocking and/or influencing your current relationship(s). Once you are aware of the limiting beliefs that you formed, as a result of what you learned, you can begin to transform them into new empowering beliefs.
So, what do you believe about intimate relationships?
The questions below can help you uncover what you learned about relationships and love in your childhood. Allow yourself to go back and experience your past memories. Notice what messages you received from your parents, family members and community and how you internalized them. Write down any insights and limiting beliefs that you discover.
1. What did your parent(s) show you about love and marriage ?
2. Were your parents divorced, or were you raised in a single-parent household?
3. Who had the power in your household?
4. As a child, did you feel loved and lovable?
5. Were there public displays of love and affection in your home?
6. Was there verbal and/or physical abuse displayed in your home?
7. Did you witness happy couples in your family or community?
8. How did those around you express and communicate their feelings?
9. How was marriage, or intimate partnerships viewed in your family?
10. What, if anything, were you told about love and relationships?
Now write a new story describing how you want to experience and feel romantic love. Write some new beliefs to attract the loving relationship that you want to have in your life. You can redesign your mind and attract the love life that you want!
Cina Sherriff is a teacher, intuitive transformational coach, and creator of the Redesign Your Mind program. Cina attracted her “boo” and best friend 28 years ago and is still happily experiencing a loving relationship. Cina can be found on her website, Facebook and Instagram